sigh. so i just realized that it's about that time -- the end of session one must have just happened, and for the first time in...wow...six years i'm not teary-eyes and suffering cty withdrawal this weekend. well, at least i wasn't, up until i was sent spiraling back into memories of the past 6 summers.
awkward icebreakers and endless name games... awful roommates, awesome roommates, asian roommates, and everything in between - i had 'em all... first loves... catfights (over boys, of course)... grabbing that special someone to dance to "stairway to heaven" and knowing that you had eight minutes to hold them close... convincing your TA that you could study more efficiently outside, lying on top of each other, without your books... feigning interest in game theory, or diseases, or that boring reading assignment... mandatory fun... sneaking drinks to make those dances just a little bit more fun... "cty goggles" aka "wow i can't believe i ever like him. what was i thinking?"... sneaking around to illegal sleepovers... grabbing someone - anyone - so that you wouldn't be alone during the slow dances... swapping stories late into the night... hall meetings that always went long because of that certain person that had to comment at absolutely everything... illegal late-night phone calls... the anticipation of the first dance... making the first move... stargazing in the dewy grass... hanging out in the bookstore, or the hallway, or the thrift store down the street - hey, it was something to do... signing up for friendship bracelet-making or a scavenger hunt just because your best friend or your crush is doing it... hot RAs and TAs... hauling yourself out of bed early saturday morning to hike to the farmer's market... making the best of truly awful cafeteria food... secretly holding hands under the desk... heated debates, over abortion or who's boyfriend was dorkier or boxers vs. briefs... watching (and participating in) truly heinous talent show acts... ahh the drama... cross-dressing on second saturday, and discovering which boys make really eerily convincing girls... feuds between halls/floors/girls - what were we fighting about?... making the most of meet market/quad time... trying to run away from the RAs... losing your lanyard in a tree (dammit, i knew i should've listened when they yelled at me not to swing my lanyard)... finally having the guts to take of your pants and swing 'em over your head... the inevitable "end of the world" accidents... really stupid inside jokes that will nevertheless stay with me and make me giggle always... embarrassing yourself endlessly - "aww, what the hell, it's only 3 weeks and i'll never see these people again"...field trips, field studies, and finding any excuse to break out of "the bubble"... the simple pleasure of turkey hill... hall bondage... pacts to be "friends 4eva" that sadly fade within 3 months but will always be there when you need them... mistakes and regrets that were fun all the same... embracing your nerdiness... the chills i still get whenever i hear "nightswimming" and "in your eyes" and "forever young" and "stairway" and "american pie"...
i guess i felt the need to mark this occaison somehow, though this isn't really a story at all - but i feel like all my cty stories have sort of faded and meshed and just become a single vague good feeling, if that makes any sense at all. to be honest, i can tell you hardly anything about all those classroom hours and those classes my parents signed me up for, but i could go on forever about inside jokes and crushes and friendships - the people are what make the experience. those were...let me count...18 weeks that have truly made me who i am, just a little bit.